Last week was a good week weight loss wise. I was down 1.6 for a total of 15.2. That is great! I am so close to reaching 10% which is the first major goal weight watchers has you strive for.
I am struggling with exercise this past week. The weather has turned cold here and it has started getting dark early. This means that the time I used to go for my walks it is now dark. I 'could' go right when I get home but after being at work all day I don't want to rush in grab my son and rush back out. I want to be able to enjoy some time with him. We have a treadmill but it seems to stop for no reason a lot. I will be running and slow down to a walk then it stops, then even as I continue walking or running it stops. By the third time I give up and just stop. I did go this weekend and purchase a new cardio dvd. All the cardio I have is from the 90s and it is really hard to focus on the exercises if you are laughing at the people.
Today is weigh in day and I am hoping for some progress probably not as good as last week, but I am thinking I should be down. We shall see!
Monday, October 19, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
I inspire myself
I continue to struggle with continuing on. It is an effort to log and track everything you eat. It stinks to have to say no or you don't say no then you have the guilt of indulging. One of the many things that is so hard about having a weight problem is that you have a problem with food and your emotions. Whether it is bored, happiness, sadness, busyness, or just plain gluttony. You continue to have these emotions every day all day. There isn't a magic switch to turn off and say nope I am not going to feel my trigger emotion. I am not going to ever have glutenous urges to gorge myself on a dozen cookies.
I struggle with exercise- I got in two days of walking last week. I can blame it on a million different things, but the truth is I am not making it a priority that it needs to be. It is the "secret" to weight loss along with what you eat. One or the other can only do so much but together they can get you where you want to be.
All in all, I think last week went ok. I did my weigh-in on Wednesday cause I was sick on Monday. After our trip, I had only gained .4 lbs. Which believe is quite an accomplishment! Where we went had yummy free cookies all day every day. And I love me some chocolate chip cookies. I did work out a couple times early in the morning, but I kept waking up my son which meant that my husband had to wake up. Not that he complained. I even was able to run for 20 min on the treadmill I couldn't believe and I probably could have gone longer, but my feet hurt and that was already a huge improvement over anything I have done before. I usually run 5 min then walk 3 and run 5, walk 3 run 5- for a total of 15 min running. I did good with eating on plan through Saturday which may or may not be close and then yesterday not so good. I also got super hungry yesterday which I think led to cravings that I just didn't control very well.
Today is weigh-in. Who knows what the scale will show! I hope it shows a nice low number.
Exercise will be hard this week as I am going to be out of town. But I will do what I can. I do not want to give up and quit. I do not feel equipped to go it on my own. I need to stay in the game.
I struggle with exercise- I got in two days of walking last week. I can blame it on a million different things, but the truth is I am not making it a priority that it needs to be. It is the "secret" to weight loss along with what you eat. One or the other can only do so much but together they can get you where you want to be.
All in all, I think last week went ok. I did my weigh-in on Wednesday cause I was sick on Monday. After our trip, I had only gained .4 lbs. Which believe is quite an accomplishment! Where we went had yummy free cookies all day every day. And I love me some chocolate chip cookies. I did work out a couple times early in the morning, but I kept waking up my son which meant that my husband had to wake up. Not that he complained. I even was able to run for 20 min on the treadmill I couldn't believe and I probably could have gone longer, but my feet hurt and that was already a huge improvement over anything I have done before. I usually run 5 min then walk 3 and run 5, walk 3 run 5- for a total of 15 min running. I did good with eating on plan through Saturday which may or may not be close and then yesterday not so good. I also got super hungry yesterday which I think led to cravings that I just didn't control very well.
Today is weigh-in. Who knows what the scale will show! I hope it shows a nice low number.
Exercise will be hard this week as I am going to be out of town. But I will do what I can. I do not want to give up and quit. I do not feel equipped to go it on my own. I need to stay in the game.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
This week's truths
So one my one night of giving in turned into a weekend of not really tracking or trying. Luckily I was fairly active that weekend. So when it came to weigh in time, I stayed even steven. Which I was happy about! I mean I would love to have lost, but when you eat bad then a 0 week turns out to be quite an accomplishment. So last week was better, I still wasn’t as strict as I have been being, but I kept up the exercise and most days stayed on track. I had a friend’s baby shower on Saturday and I let myself enjoy it. Almost a little too much since I had that yucky ate too much/full feeling in my stomach. Yesterday was weigh in and I was down 1.4! Woohoo!
I am always surprised by the people who do ww and they don’t stay for the meetings. I don’t mean missing one or two cause we all know life gets busy, but week after week they drive to ww go in, weigh in and leave. To me, I am like I am already here let me see what they have to say. Last night was a good night to stay. Our leader teaches several different classes at different locations. She had asked a member from another class to come and talk to us about her weight loss journey. This is her 4th go at ww. This last time she came in at 500 pounds and her doctor had told her she either had to lose weight or he wouldn’t be able to treat her anymore. That was 4 ½ years ago, today she is down 227 pounds. It was very emotional to hear her speak about how ww/losing weight has literally saved her life. She even said that she has no idea how she got to where she was. This year she said she hasn’t really lost weight but the bonus is that she hasn’t gained and she hasn’t quit. She knew if she quit where she is headed- right back up that scale. So no matter the monthly costs for membership, she was going to continue to come and be at the meetings get the support she needed to keep on her journey. She even echoed the senitments in my last post that she will always struggle with this. It was such a good reminder that we have to keep moving/looking forward, because to give up and turn around is only going to hurt our bodies and ourselves more. We are only cheating ourselves of the life we could lead.
I have had some tough moments this past week. I really wanted to eat out one night and I started doing my nutritional information search. I get so disgusted by what I see. The points that it costs me (really the calories and fat) is disheartening that I can’t just go and eat mindlessly like before. I settled for making dinner at home then going to get some ice cream. I got the sugar free fat free and it tastes decent enough, but it wasn’t the double chocolate chunk that I wanted or the delicious smore type that my husband got. We sat there and ate our ice cream and I watched all these people come and get huge scoops of their favorite and I was bummed. I will never be able to be like that. Now granted I don’t know what these people do, maybe they run marathons though it didn’t look like it or maybe this is their one treat a month. Who knows, but it is hard for me to come to grips with the fact I can not reach or maintain my goal and be able to go out or grocery shop and mindlessly get whatever. Maybe if I can train myself to run 5 miles everyday- maybe then. For now, I guess I will continue on my ww way, cause I have already made great strides and I don’t want to quit and turn around knowing what the other holds.
Next week we are going on vacation. It is going to be hard, because there is no option for making my own meals or really even bringing anything other than a couple snacks. Granted there should be opportunities to eat well, but there will be plenty and I do mean plenty of chances for me to eat bad – really bad. Luckily there is also chances for me to work out. Right now my plan is to do well for breakfast and lunch and be less lenient at dinner. I mean it is vacation it is the after vacation part that I need to be concerned with. I am already planning on how to get back on track once we return and possibly begin a jogging training program for our return.
I am always surprised by the people who do ww and they don’t stay for the meetings. I don’t mean missing one or two cause we all know life gets busy, but week after week they drive to ww go in, weigh in and leave. To me, I am like I am already here let me see what they have to say. Last night was a good night to stay. Our leader teaches several different classes at different locations. She had asked a member from another class to come and talk to us about her weight loss journey. This is her 4th go at ww. This last time she came in at 500 pounds and her doctor had told her she either had to lose weight or he wouldn’t be able to treat her anymore. That was 4 ½ years ago, today she is down 227 pounds. It was very emotional to hear her speak about how ww/losing weight has literally saved her life. She even said that she has no idea how she got to where she was. This year she said she hasn’t really lost weight but the bonus is that she hasn’t gained and she hasn’t quit. She knew if she quit where she is headed- right back up that scale. So no matter the monthly costs for membership, she was going to continue to come and be at the meetings get the support she needed to keep on her journey. She even echoed the senitments in my last post that she will always struggle with this. It was such a good reminder that we have to keep moving/looking forward, because to give up and turn around is only going to hurt our bodies and ourselves more. We are only cheating ourselves of the life we could lead.
I have had some tough moments this past week. I really wanted to eat out one night and I started doing my nutritional information search. I get so disgusted by what I see. The points that it costs me (really the calories and fat) is disheartening that I can’t just go and eat mindlessly like before. I settled for making dinner at home then going to get some ice cream. I got the sugar free fat free and it tastes decent enough, but it wasn’t the double chocolate chunk that I wanted or the delicious smore type that my husband got. We sat there and ate our ice cream and I watched all these people come and get huge scoops of their favorite and I was bummed. I will never be able to be like that. Now granted I don’t know what these people do, maybe they run marathons though it didn’t look like it or maybe this is their one treat a month. Who knows, but it is hard for me to come to grips with the fact I can not reach or maintain my goal and be able to go out or grocery shop and mindlessly get whatever. Maybe if I can train myself to run 5 miles everyday- maybe then. For now, I guess I will continue on my ww way, cause I have already made great strides and I don’t want to quit and turn around knowing what the other holds.
Next week we are going on vacation. It is going to be hard, because there is no option for making my own meals or really even bringing anything other than a couple snacks. Granted there should be opportunities to eat well, but there will be plenty and I do mean plenty of chances for me to eat bad – really bad. Luckily there is also chances for me to work out. Right now my plan is to do well for breakfast and lunch and be less lenient at dinner. I mean it is vacation it is the after vacation part that I need to be concerned with. I am already planning on how to get back on track once we return and possibly begin a jogging training program for our return.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
I gave in...
So I said I was going to be truthful. Last night I had some serious cravings. Not for anything in particular but just for food I shouldn’t have. What’s worse is I gave in. I am beating myself up for it when I just need to let it go. What did it start from? I didn’t want to track lunch. Not that I did bad at lunch I actually ate pretty well I think, I just didn’t feel like taking the time to figure it all out. If I am being truthful it is draining to always count points and ultimately calories and fat. But this is my life – this is what works.
I was discussing weight loss with a friend the other day and I compared being overweight and trying to lose it to alcohol or cigarette addiction. Now I realize alcohol addiction is very serious. Both of those have horrible harmful effects on your body. So does being overweight. The strain on your body and heart is documented. I, and anyone who is significantly overweight, will always struggle with being overweight. No matter if I am sporting a size 2 body for 10 years – the mindset, the habits, and tendencies will always be in me. I will always have to watch what I eat. Now that doesn’t mean every day all day, but just like last night I will have the ability to take one bad night and turn it in to a bad year or worse years. I will have to constantly monitor my food intake and my weight. I will have to make sure exercise is a part of my daily life not weekly or monthly or once every couple, my DAILY life. Going from being overweight to being healthy is not something with an end date. This is why diets won’t work for those with significant weight issues. If you have 5 pounds to lose, because you ate too many holiday cookies, then fine you add in an extra workout or two and say no to dessert for a couple weeks you can probably get there and stay there relatively easy. But if you have significant weight to lose, once you get to goal comes the next phase – the maintenance phase. You got there alright, but how are you going to stay there? Through monitoring your intake and your activity level. Yes, this is daunting and depressing to think about. But it is worth the effort. Also you can’t focus on forever, you can only focus on the first 1, 5 or 10 pounds.
Today I put on a dress I bought a couple months ago. At the time, it fit but it wasn’t the best at hiding the mommy pooch. (If you don’t already have kids you may not know what this is but it is a scientific term and it’s worse for the lucky ones that had a c-section too). Today I tried on the dress and it is great. Course the pooch is still there, but a lot less noticeable. So what does this all mean?? It means I have to get back on track today. I can’t let hormones derail me anymore at least this week! Today is a new day! Luckily for me, WW is a forgiving program. They even have extra weekly points built in for such occasions as last night.
I was discussing weight loss with a friend the other day and I compared being overweight and trying to lose it to alcohol or cigarette addiction. Now I realize alcohol addiction is very serious. Both of those have horrible harmful effects on your body. So does being overweight. The strain on your body and heart is documented. I, and anyone who is significantly overweight, will always struggle with being overweight. No matter if I am sporting a size 2 body for 10 years – the mindset, the habits, and tendencies will always be in me. I will always have to watch what I eat. Now that doesn’t mean every day all day, but just like last night I will have the ability to take one bad night and turn it in to a bad year or worse years. I will have to constantly monitor my food intake and my weight. I will have to make sure exercise is a part of my daily life not weekly or monthly or once every couple, my DAILY life. Going from being overweight to being healthy is not something with an end date. This is why diets won’t work for those with significant weight issues. If you have 5 pounds to lose, because you ate too many holiday cookies, then fine you add in an extra workout or two and say no to dessert for a couple weeks you can probably get there and stay there relatively easy. But if you have significant weight to lose, once you get to goal comes the next phase – the maintenance phase. You got there alright, but how are you going to stay there? Through monitoring your intake and your activity level. Yes, this is daunting and depressing to think about. But it is worth the effort. Also you can’t focus on forever, you can only focus on the first 1, 5 or 10 pounds.
Today I put on a dress I bought a couple months ago. At the time, it fit but it wasn’t the best at hiding the mommy pooch. (If you don’t already have kids you may not know what this is but it is a scientific term and it’s worse for the lucky ones that had a c-section too). Today I tried on the dress and it is great. Course the pooch is still there, but a lot less noticeable. So what does this all mean?? It means I have to get back on track today. I can’t let hormones derail me anymore at least this week! Today is a new day! Luckily for me, WW is a forgiving program. They even have extra weekly points built in for such occasions as last night.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Return from being long lost
Ok wow so it has been almost 2 months since I started this blog and promised you great things. You should know that I was horrible at keeping diaries as a kid. I just couldn't remember to do it. Well I am back and luckily I have not been so lax in the weight loss department. On July 13, I joined Weight Watchers. I have lost 11.6 pounds. I also think I have become one of those annoying people who are so excited about what they are doing to lose weight that I tell everyone. I even spout off the ww motto it is not a diet it is a lifestyle change. Which it is! Now I am not cured of my gummi bear addiction or my french fry addiction. But I have been very good. Unfortunately ww does allow me to partake in my sweets addiction on a daily basis with their oh so delicious ice cream. I have a feeling as I lose more and more weight I will lose my ability to enjoy such things daily, but we will have to cross that bridge later. I mean I am not a saint.
I think the key thing for me is keeping track of what I eat. I take mental notes and compare them to how I used to eat and it is crazy the difference. Now we may eat out once or twice a week, before 5-6 nights a week and probably most lunches. I haven't become a chef or anything either. We still do lots of simple meals, just because we are tired and busy. But at least I am looking at the nutritional information and trying to get in more fruits and veggies.
The most exciting thing for me is that I have actually am able to fit into a size pants that I have never fit into before (or atleast since I remember my weight see previous post). Oh that was a happy day and of course I had to buy the pants- hey at least they were 70% off!! I could still probably afford to lose a couple pounds to make them look great but that is ok. I also went through my clothes and took out all the ones that were too big out of the closet. For now they are in trash bags in the bedroom. I am internally fighting with whether to give them away, save them for a yard sale we are already planning for if we have another child or try to sell them (it is crazy how many things have tags on them because I bought them a tag snug or when I had lost weight which I quickly gained back). I know Dr Phil says once you are out of a size/clothes to get rid of everything cause by keeping it you are like allowing the possibility to get back into the size to stick around. I definitely don't want to get back in the size, but it is so hard.
I have started back running and am planning on starting the Couch 2 5K training program next week. I am feeling a little under the weather, so I hope it passes quickly.
Anyways, I will try to post like I should.
I think the key thing for me is keeping track of what I eat. I take mental notes and compare them to how I used to eat and it is crazy the difference. Now we may eat out once or twice a week, before 5-6 nights a week and probably most lunches. I haven't become a chef or anything either. We still do lots of simple meals, just because we are tired and busy. But at least I am looking at the nutritional information and trying to get in more fruits and veggies.
The most exciting thing for me is that I have actually am able to fit into a size pants that I have never fit into before (or atleast since I remember my weight see previous post). Oh that was a happy day and of course I had to buy the pants- hey at least they were 70% off!! I could still probably afford to lose a couple pounds to make them look great but that is ok. I also went through my clothes and took out all the ones that were too big out of the closet. For now they are in trash bags in the bedroom. I am internally fighting with whether to give them away, save them for a yard sale we are already planning for if we have another child or try to sell them (it is crazy how many things have tags on them because I bought them a tag snug or when I had lost weight which I quickly gained back). I know Dr Phil says once you are out of a size/clothes to get rid of everything cause by keeping it you are like allowing the possibility to get back into the size to stick around. I definitely don't want to get back in the size, but it is so hard.
I have started back running and am planning on starting the Couch 2 5K training program next week. I am feeling a little under the weather, so I hope it passes quickly.
Anyways, I will try to post like I should.
Monday, July 6, 2009
You may be thinking
What is she going to do about it??
I haven't quite figured it out. I mean there are so many options out there. I can just eat lettuce or I can go strictly meat and nuts. Realistically though I am not going to keep either of those up very long ok even a day. I tried South Beach again last week and barely made it 3 days. So my choices are go it on my own or I could try Weight Watchers. I know some people who have had great experience with it and some who haven't changed at all.
I mean I know what to do- it is just the simple fact of doing it. Maybe I have too much pride to pay someone to tell me something I already know. I know WW is more than just that, but that is how I think - lie.
Exercise- You know I almost believe it when I say I would exercise for several hours if it meant I could eat anything I want. But if I am being real, then I know I won't. I will be happy and lucky to get in an hour most days meaning 5 days out of 7. I need 2 days to not feel like I have to do anything.
So here we go!
I haven't quite figured it out. I mean there are so many options out there. I can just eat lettuce or I can go strictly meat and nuts. Realistically though I am not going to keep either of those up very long ok even a day. I tried South Beach again last week and barely made it 3 days. So my choices are go it on my own or I could try Weight Watchers. I know some people who have had great experience with it and some who haven't changed at all.
I mean I know what to do- it is just the simple fact of doing it. Maybe I have too much pride to pay someone to tell me something I already know. I know WW is more than just that, but that is how I think - lie.
Exercise- You know I almost believe it when I say I would exercise for several hours if it meant I could eat anything I want. But if I am being real, then I know I won't. I will be happy and lucky to get in an hour most days meaning 5 days out of 7. I need 2 days to not feel like I have to do anything.
So here we go!
A little more history
In 2002, I reached my highest weight (not being pregnant). At that time, I got serious. I started watching what I ate, but I won't say I dieted. I just ate different things. Honestly I don't even remember what I ate before this time. I was in college and I started eating oatmeal for breakfast and chicken wraps. I also started running- ok so running/walking. I would walk and run switching back and forth on the treadmill. I also started yoga. I lost 30 pounds. My clothes fit better and I never actually went down a size which I guess means I was stuffing myself into my original clothes. I did this because at the time I was preparing for my wedding to my ex-husband. This loss was short lived as after we got married I went back to my old ways of eating. It is so hard not to when you have been doing that for over 10 years. But I wasn't happy and we didn't have a lot of money, so quick and not so healthy was the way I went.
For the next years, I had this magic number that I dare not go above in my head. I was always on the brink but never over. If I got too close, I would do a little something and take a pound or two off then keep on my merry way. Only it wasn't merry. I was and still am miserable with my body. I hate the way I look. The way I don't feel 'normal sized'.
Then in 2006 as I preparing for my wedding to Jason. I tried the south beach diet. And those first couple weeks worked. I don't know how much I lost, but it too didn't last. I got caught up in wedding this and that and my get healthy plan fell to the curb.
In 2007, we decided we were going to try to have a baby. I had dreamed of becoming fit and healthy before getting pregnant, but it didn't happen. Then at my first appointment the weigh in I was over my magic number. But you are not supposed to diet when you are pregnant, so I just let it go. I did good until about the end of the second trimester when I found out I could eat all the things I had avoided in the beginning due to morning sickness. All in all I gained 30 pounds. Which is the normal amount for someone who is in the healthy weight range. Not too bad I guess. After I had Jackson in May 2008, I; thanks to the awesomeness; of breastfeeding was back at my first appointment weight by 6 weeks. I had planned to cook dinners while on leave which never happened. Then when I went back to work I hardly had time to leave the house dressed, so getting something healthy for breakfast didn't happen. This also meant preparing my lunch didn't happen either. Then something wondrous happen at about 3-4 months post partum I self diagnosed myself as being hyperthyroid. I had been like this before except at the time I was not losing weight I was gaining it due to who knows what. But this time I was losing. It didn't matter what I ate I lost weight. Now while this is a great side effect, this disease is serious and can cause strokes and vision problems just to name a few. So I went to the doctor who prescribed me mediciation.
So when I started taking the medicine, I knew I had to start being better about what I ate as it returns your metabolism to normal. Throw in a couple extra months and now we are here today. I did not change my eating habits long term. Because my thyroid is now functioning normally I have gained 10 pounds back of the almost 40 I lost from my pre-pregnancy weight. You know even though I lost that much and I can wear a smaller size I still don't see myself any different. The only time I can tell is in some pictures.
But now today I probably need to lose 40 pounds to be in the healthy range for my height and not just on the outside.
But I want to take that number as a whole and break it down. Cause 40 is just too scary and too much. So I will start with losing the 10 I already gained back.
And while we are here, let me throw another lie at you. In my head, I think that my body isn't designed to be that small or I can't/will never achieve it. As my friend says the devil is a lie. Why can't I?? There is nothing wrong with me. I know my thyroid is correct (which if you are having problems have your doctor check it cause it can greatly affect your weight and how you feel). I think my calves will never be smaller than they are (which by the way are my least favorite part of my body)
For the next years, I had this magic number that I dare not go above in my head. I was always on the brink but never over. If I got too close, I would do a little something and take a pound or two off then keep on my merry way. Only it wasn't merry. I was and still am miserable with my body. I hate the way I look. The way I don't feel 'normal sized'.
Then in 2006 as I preparing for my wedding to Jason. I tried the south beach diet. And those first couple weeks worked. I don't know how much I lost, but it too didn't last. I got caught up in wedding this and that and my get healthy plan fell to the curb.
In 2007, we decided we were going to try to have a baby. I had dreamed of becoming fit and healthy before getting pregnant, but it didn't happen. Then at my first appointment the weigh in I was over my magic number. But you are not supposed to diet when you are pregnant, so I just let it go. I did good until about the end of the second trimester when I found out I could eat all the things I had avoided in the beginning due to morning sickness. All in all I gained 30 pounds. Which is the normal amount for someone who is in the healthy weight range. Not too bad I guess. After I had Jackson in May 2008, I; thanks to the awesomeness; of breastfeeding was back at my first appointment weight by 6 weeks. I had planned to cook dinners while on leave which never happened. Then when I went back to work I hardly had time to leave the house dressed, so getting something healthy for breakfast didn't happen. This also meant preparing my lunch didn't happen either. Then something wondrous happen at about 3-4 months post partum I self diagnosed myself as being hyperthyroid. I had been like this before except at the time I was not losing weight I was gaining it due to who knows what. But this time I was losing. It didn't matter what I ate I lost weight. Now while this is a great side effect, this disease is serious and can cause strokes and vision problems just to name a few. So I went to the doctor who prescribed me mediciation.
So when I started taking the medicine, I knew I had to start being better about what I ate as it returns your metabolism to normal. Throw in a couple extra months and now we are here today. I did not change my eating habits long term. Because my thyroid is now functioning normally I have gained 10 pounds back of the almost 40 I lost from my pre-pregnancy weight. You know even though I lost that much and I can wear a smaller size I still don't see myself any different. The only time I can tell is in some pictures.
But now today I probably need to lose 40 pounds to be in the healthy range for my height and not just on the outside.
But I want to take that number as a whole and break it down. Cause 40 is just too scary and too much. So I will start with losing the 10 I already gained back.
And while we are here, let me throw another lie at you. In my head, I think that my body isn't designed to be that small or I can't/will never achieve it. As my friend says the devil is a lie. Why can't I?? There is nothing wrong with me. I know my thyroid is correct (which if you are having problems have your doctor check it cause it can greatly affect your weight and how you feel). I think my calves will never be smaller than they are (which by the way are my least favorite part of my body)
Ok so I said I'd food and exercise journal- Day 1
Monday, July 6, 2009
Breakfast- One onion bagel with cream cheese and a diet coke
Snack- 4 pieces of celery with a wedge of laughing cow cheese
Lunch- Lean cuisine meal, watermelon and some pistachios.
Snack- Orange
Working on 2nd jug of water probably a 32 oz size.
Breakfast- One onion bagel with cream cheese and a diet coke
Snack- 4 pieces of celery with a wedge of laughing cow cheese
Lunch- Lean cuisine meal, watermelon and some pistachios.
Snack- Orange
Working on 2nd jug of water probably a 32 oz size.
Ok here we go- Day 1
So I can't bring myself to actually write down the number. I mean I know it and I am sure you could probably guess it, but I still can't write it down. First lie, the number on my drivers license is wrong. I know that I am not the only one out there who lies about it, but I don't want to lie. Side note- I don't know why they make you put it on there maybe they should go to ranges.
First truth, I am going to use this blog as motivation. I will food journal and exercise log my life. So I can see it in black and white and maybe one day I will get far enough away from my true current number that I will be willing to share this and it with everyone.
The person who sells the biggest lies about weight loss is myself. I have always found ways to sabotage my efforts and ultimately hurt my health. I know the truths that McDonalds cheeseburgers and fries and now those oh so yummy cookies are bad for me in calories, fats and carbs - ok in every way possible, but that doesn't stop me. When I go there, I just can not bring myself to order one of their salads or at least substitute fruits for fries.
I know that typical fast food is horrible for anyone trying to lose weight and heck even if you are trying to gain weight (who are these people??) there is a better way to go about it. But the dang convenience factor. I don't know what I used before as my excuse, but now it is that I work full time and raise my son.
Let me clear the air real quick I do not feed my son fast food junk. Usually if we get him anything from fast food it is grilled chicken and then we give him vegetables. I guess my excess weight that I have had my whole life has made me so passionate that he will not be like that. So I am very sensitive that he not get sweets and fried foods. Even though I seem to be battling this with my parents who insist that he have whatever they have. I keep promising them that he will forget and move on if he doesn't have a cookie or gummi bear.
Anyway, that has been my excuse. But I have decided that should also be my reason . My beautiful son who I want to be a role model for should see that his mom is both healthy and happy. Eventually when he finds his voice, how can I say you can't have a double cheeseburger with fries and coke even though mommy is eating it.
Another lie I sell myself is I don't need daily exercise. If I look around me I can't really think of anyone who does daily exercise so this is an easy one to buy. I mean sure some people do it if they are trying to lose weight, but I don't know anyone who does it just to do it. So if they don't do it, I don't need to right? Wrong. Daily exercise is key to getting and staying fit. I want to be able to remain limber and able to keep up with Jackson as he gets bigger.
And you want to know the saddest and biggest lie of all? Those of you who are naturally slim probably won't understand this, but those of you heavier like me might. I think I actually deserve to able to eat junk. And not just occasionally but like 3 times a day. Oh this one hurts to admit, that there are many days where I will eat out at fast food or a restaurant for every meal. Biscuit in the morning, burger at lunch and say mexican for dinner. Course that doesn't add in any sweets I decide that I deserve. I decide I deserve these things, because I had a bad day or even a good day, or I don't have time to do anything else or I forgot my breakfast or lunch or I am too tired to do dinner. Do you see the lies in there? And besides the impact on my waistline if you figure I do this every weekday for a month (not that I do/did this but for example sake) at $5 a meal. That is roughly $300!!! Ugh if that doesn't make your stomach hurt who knows what will.
I said naturally slim earlier and I want to say I live with one of those gifted people. My husband is and has always been slim - no matter what he eats. Believe me he is right there with me at the mexican restaurant eating the chips and cheese dip. His waist doesn't grow, he doesn't get an extra chin, nothing. So as hard as he may try he doesn't understand the struggles I have been through. On top of all that, he is so easy going even when I tell him not to let me eat out anymore, then if I ask him to pick something up on the way home he does it. So that means that my health falls to me. All me. I have to be the one to say no and to make sure I get the proper nutrients; I have to put on my shoes and walk around the block. No one else can make me healthier.
First truth, I am going to use this blog as motivation. I will food journal and exercise log my life. So I can see it in black and white and maybe one day I will get far enough away from my true current number that I will be willing to share this and it with everyone.
The person who sells the biggest lies about weight loss is myself. I have always found ways to sabotage my efforts and ultimately hurt my health. I know the truths that McDonalds cheeseburgers and fries and now those oh so yummy cookies are bad for me in calories, fats and carbs - ok in every way possible, but that doesn't stop me. When I go there, I just can not bring myself to order one of their salads or at least substitute fruits for fries.
I know that typical fast food is horrible for anyone trying to lose weight and heck even if you are trying to gain weight (who are these people??) there is a better way to go about it. But the dang convenience factor. I don't know what I used before as my excuse, but now it is that I work full time and raise my son.
Let me clear the air real quick I do not feed my son fast food junk. Usually if we get him anything from fast food it is grilled chicken and then we give him vegetables. I guess my excess weight that I have had my whole life has made me so passionate that he will not be like that. So I am very sensitive that he not get sweets and fried foods. Even though I seem to be battling this with my parents who insist that he have whatever they have. I keep promising them that he will forget and move on if he doesn't have a cookie or gummi bear.
Anyway, that has been my excuse. But I have decided that should also be my reason . My beautiful son who I want to be a role model for should see that his mom is both healthy and happy. Eventually when he finds his voice, how can I say you can't have a double cheeseburger with fries and coke even though mommy is eating it.
Another lie I sell myself is I don't need daily exercise. If I look around me I can't really think of anyone who does daily exercise so this is an easy one to buy. I mean sure some people do it if they are trying to lose weight, but I don't know anyone who does it just to do it. So if they don't do it, I don't need to right? Wrong. Daily exercise is key to getting and staying fit. I want to be able to remain limber and able to keep up with Jackson as he gets bigger.
And you want to know the saddest and biggest lie of all? Those of you who are naturally slim probably won't understand this, but those of you heavier like me might. I think I actually deserve to able to eat junk. And not just occasionally but like 3 times a day. Oh this one hurts to admit, that there are many days where I will eat out at fast food or a restaurant for every meal. Biscuit in the morning, burger at lunch and say mexican for dinner. Course that doesn't add in any sweets I decide that I deserve. I decide I deserve these things, because I had a bad day or even a good day, or I don't have time to do anything else or I forgot my breakfast or lunch or I am too tired to do dinner. Do you see the lies in there? And besides the impact on my waistline if you figure I do this every weekday for a month (not that I do/did this but for example sake) at $5 a meal. That is roughly $300!!! Ugh if that doesn't make your stomach hurt who knows what will.
I said naturally slim earlier and I want to say I live with one of those gifted people. My husband is and has always been slim - no matter what he eats. Believe me he is right there with me at the mexican restaurant eating the chips and cheese dip. His waist doesn't grow, he doesn't get an extra chin, nothing. So as hard as he may try he doesn't understand the struggles I have been through. On top of all that, he is so easy going even when I tell him not to let me eat out anymore, then if I ask him to pick something up on the way home he does it. So that means that my health falls to me. All me. I have to be the one to say no and to make sure I get the proper nutrients; I have to put on my shoes and walk around the block. No one else can make me healthier.
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